志萍的三分田

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03月 7th, 2017

【原创】1002.The One Where Ross is Fine—Part2

老友记笔记, by 李志萍.

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[Scene: Ross's Apartment. Ross is totally wasted, but he's still drinking all the margaritas.]

Ross: You know, that first batch of margaritas was not so great, but the second batch is good.

Rachel: Well, maybe the next batch, we could all get some.

Ross: Oh, guys, this is fun, isn't it? You know, just the four of us. Just hanging.

Joey: Dude, are you okay? And when are the fajitas gonna be ready?

Ross: I'm fine, okay? I'm great! I'm just, I'm just proud of us, you know. There's no weirdness, no tension.
weirdness [wiədnis]: 奇怪

Rachel: No awareness.
awareness [ə'wɛənis]: 意识

Ross: You know, we make a great foursome. We should do more stuff together. Oh! Let's take a trip. We
could all go on your boat. Joey has this amazing
sailboat.
foursome [ˈfɔrsəm]: a group of four people taking part in a social activity or sport together 四人一组,四人一队

Joey: Actually, Ross, I sold the boat two years ago.

Ross: Oh, no. Idiot!  

Joey: Well, yeah, yeah, yeah, but I could get another one. This trip sounds great.

Ross: Yeah? Okay, where do you think we-we can go? [The oven timer pings in the kitchen.] My fajitas! 
[
He runs off to the kitchen.]
ping [pɪŋ]: If a bell or a piece of metal pings, it makes a short, high-pitched noise. 发出"砰"的声音

Rachel: Look, Charlie, I just want you to know. Ross is just having a little trouble adjusting to the thought
of Joey and me. You know, he normally doesn't drink like this.
adjust to [əˈdʒʌst tu]: 调整以适应,调节

Charlie: Oh, you know what? This is nothing. My father is a raging alcoholic. [Joey and Rachel don't know
how to respond to that.
] Oh, I'm sorry, have I made this evening uncomfortable?
raging [ˈreɪdʒɪŋ]: Raging is used to describe things, especially bad things, that are very intense. 严重的(尤指坏事)

[Ross enters carrying a frying pan with fajitas.]

Ross: Fajitas! Be careful! Very hot plate, very hot plate!

Rachel: Ross, you don't even have oven mitts on!
oven mitt (<同>223.Monica: I taped oven mitts to their hands.)

Ross: That is gonna hurt tomorrow!

[Scene: Central Perk. Frank Jr., Phoebe and the triplets are there. Continued from earlier.]

Phoebe: Okay, well, this is crazy. We can't seriously be talking about me taking one of your kids, can we?

Frank Jr.: Oh, no, of course we're not.

Phoebe: That's insane.

Frank Jr.: I know.

Phoebe: Alice would never go for it, right?

Frank Jr.: Oh, I don't know. She's pretty tired, too. I think we could get her on board.

Phoebe: Well, just, you know, for argument's sake, you know, hypothetically, which one would you be willing
to give up?
for something's sake: 为了…的目的

Frank Jr.: Huh.

Phoebe: Frank Jr.Jr.?

Frank Jr.: Well, it'd be great for my shoulder. Oh, you'd be getting a really good one. He's really funny. Like,
the other day
, he made up this joke. What's green and says "hey, I'm a frog"? A talking frog! Oh, no, you
can't have him
. He's too funny

Phoebe: Well, alright, that's fine. What about Leslie?

Frank Jr.: Oh, no, no. Not Leslie. No, she's, she's the only one that knows how to burp the alphabet.
burp the alphabet (<近>105.Monica: Not after your cousin who could belch the alphabet.)

Phoebe: Alright, so that leaves Chandler.

Frank Jr.: Oh, no, no, no, you can't have Chandler. No, no, no. She's my little genius. I got big hopes for
her.
 She's gonna be a doctor or a Realtor.
I got big hopes for her. (<比>810.Bobby: Well, I really have high hopes for my band.)
Realtor ['riəltə]: a real estate agent who is a member of the National Association of Realtors, an agency that
licenses them  房地产经纪人(尤指美国房地产行业工会成员)

Phoebe: Wow, Frank, I think we just ran out of kids.

Frank Jr.: Oh, I think you're right. Oh, wow. Phoebe, I don't think I can give one of them up. I mean,
you know, they drive me crazy, but they're my babies.

Phoebe: I'm sorry, Frank. I didn't realize things were so bad. You know, I'll help out more. I can-I can babysit
any time you want. You name the day, and I'll be there.

Frank Jr.: How about tomorrow?

Phoebe: Well, that's not good. But, you know, I can move some stuff around, and I'll be there. You and Alice
just take the whole day together.

Frank Jr.: You'd do that for us?

Phoebe: Are you kidding? That's what sisters are for.

Frank Jr.: Oh, look at them! I love you so much. [strokes Leslie's hair, and she moves a little] Oh, crap.
D
on't wake up, don't wake up!

[Scene: Bill and Colleen's. Chandler comes running into the living room. Monica is the only one there.]

Chandler: Where are Bill and Colleen?

Monica: Well, they're in the kitchen getting something to eat. Can you believe how nice they are?

Chandler: We have to leave!

Monica: Why? What did you do in the bathroom?

Chandler: I didn't get to the bathroom. I bumped into Owen on the way. And he didn't know he was
adopted.
And there's a slight chance I may have told him.

Monica: Oh, my God, where's my purse? No, you know what? I can replace everything in there. Get that
binder, and let's go!

[Bill and Colleen enter.]

Colleen: Hey.

Bill: Some little snacks for everybody. Oh, you don't have to eat the sour worms. Those are for Owen.

Colleen: I'll go get him in a second. By the way, you should know we haven't told him he's adopted yet.

Chandler: But kids are so intuitive. Don't you think, on some level, he already knows?
intuitive [ɪnˈtuɪtɪv]: (of people) able to understand something by using feelings rather than by considering the facts
凭直觉的;基于直觉的

[Owen comes running in.]

Owen: I'm adopted?

Chandler: See? Intuitive!

Bill: What? Where did you hear that?

Owen: He told me and paid me 50 dollars not to tell.

Chandler: Which, technically, now you should give back!

Colleen: You told him he's adopted?

Chandler: I'm so sorry, but you should have a sign out there or something. Or at least whisper it to people
when they come in the door. "Owen doesn't know he's adopted, and he also thinks that Santa is real."

Owen: He isn't?

Chandler: [to Monica] We have to get out of here, baby!

Colleen: What is the matter with you?  

Monica: All right, look, I know what Chandler did was not the best, but anyone would assume that a
12-year-old has been told he's adopted.

Colleen: Yeah, he's 8.

Monica: Wow, he's tall. What country did you get him from?

[Scene: Ross's Apartment. Rachel, Joey and Charlie are eating fajitas when Ross enters from the kitchen.]

Ross: Everyone, I would like to make a toast to Rachel and Joey.

Rachel: Oy.

Ross: And to love. Ah, love. L-O-V-E, love. L is for life. And what is life without love?

Rachel: Oh, my God, are we supposed to answer?

Ross: O is for "oh, wow!" The V is for this very surprising turn of events, which I am still fine with, by the way.
E is for how extremely normal I find it
 that you two are together, and that one day you might get married
and have children of your own.
turn of events (<同>621.Phoebe: Hmm, quite an interesting turn of events.) 

Joey: Dude, are you okay?

Ross: Totally.

Rachel: Ross, you don't seem okay.

Ross: I'm sorry, it must be the pressure of entertaining. I think everyone would feel better if we had some
flan.
entertaining [ˌɛntərˈteɪnɪŋ]: 招待;宴客
flan (<同>222.Monica: We're having a birthday flan.)

Charlie: Wait, Ross. Ross, I-I have to take off.

Ross: No!

Charlie: I'm sorry, I have a really early class in the morning, but this has been lovely.

Ross: Wasn't it? And-and you thought it would be awkward with Joey and that you never really liked Rachel.

Charlie: You're on fire! I'll call you in the morning, okay?

Ross: Okay.

Charlie: Alright. [Ross goes to the kitchen.] God, Rachel, what Ross just said, that is just so...

Rachel: Oh, that's okay. Girls tend not to like me.
tend not to: 倾向于不

Charlie: Fine.

[Ross enters from the kitchen with three plates with flan.]

Ross: Okay, I guess it's just flan for three! Hey, hey, that rhymes!

Rachel: You know what, Ross? I think we're gonna take off too.

Ross: Oh, oh, of course. God, I'm so stupid. You guys are a couple now. I mean, you probably just wanna 
be alone.

Rachel: No, no, it's just that it's getting late…

Ross: Hey, hey, hey, it's fine. It's totally fine. We've got plenty of margaritas. It's all good. [The oven
timer pings again.
] I don't even know what that's for. [He goes back to the kitchen.]

Joey: You know what? I think I'm gonna stay here and make sure he's okay.

Rachel: Yeah, that's probably a good idea.

Joey: Yeah. I'll see you in the morning.

Rachel: Uh-huh. Okay. Yeah, you know, Joey, I-I don't think he's ever gonna be okay with this.

Joey: It doesn't look good, does it?

[They kiss each other on the cheek, and Rachel leaves.]

Ross: I guess I made Tater Tots.
Tater Tots: 炸土豆小块,参见109.文化详解10.(3)

Joey: Ross, oven mitts!

Ross: Oh!

[Scene: Ross's Apartment. The next morning. Ross is very hungover on the couch as Joey enters with a
cup of coffee for him.]

Joey: Morning. Here you go.

Ross: Thanks. Did you, you stay here all night?

Joey: Yeah.

Ross: So you took off my pants and shoes?

Joey: No, no, no. You actually did that when you were dancing to the Chicago soundtrack. Look, Ross,
about
-about Rachel and I, listen, you don't have to worry about that, okay? Because nothing's gonna
happen.
soundtrack (<同>817.Monica: Uh, honey, the Miami Vice soundtrack? Really?)

Ross: What do you mean?

Joey: Well, she and I said from the beginning that we weren't gonna do anything unless you were
okay with it
. And, clearly...

Ross: Hey, what are you talking about? I'm fine.

Joey: Are we still doing this?

Ross: 
No.

Joey: It's okay, Ross. I totally understand. Of course you're not fine. You're...You're Ross and Rachel.

Ross: Yeah, except we're not. I mean, we haven't been a couple in, like, six years. Oh, my God, is
that right?
Has it been that long?

Joey: That's what I hear, yeah.

Ross: This is crazy. I mean, six years? And because of me, you guys aren't gonna be together?
Can I ask you something?
Really, what is this thing with you and Rachel?

Joey: Come on, you know me. You know…

Ross: Joey.

Joey: I'm crazy about her.

Ross: And she feels the same way?

Joey: I think so.

Ross: Well, then, maybe it's time we all moved on.

Joey: Yeah, but, Ross, I mean, you're not okay with it.

Ross: No, but I wanna be. Hey, hey, I will be. Besides, I'm with Charlie, right? Oh, my God, I'm still with
Charlie, aren't I? I mean, she didn't see the dance, did she?

Joey: No, no, no, no, that was-that was just for me. Hey, you, uh, you sure about this?

Ross: Yeah, I'm sure.

Joey: And we're okay?

[Ross smiles and holds up his hand for a high-five, but he has forgotten about his burnt hands. He
gasps in pain as Joey grabs his hand.
]

Closing Credits

[Scene: Central Perk. Monica and Chandler enter as Phoebe is there with the triplets.]

Monica: Hey, Pheebs.

Phoebe: Hey.

Monica: Um, we just wanna give you a heads-up. Bill and Colleen hate us.

Phoebe: Why?

Chandler: Owen didn't know he was adopted, and Monica told him.

Monica: What? [slaps him]

Phoebe: He didn't know? He's 12.

Monica: No, he's only 8. I'll bet he's Russian.

Phoebe: Still, he had to find out sometime.

Chandler: Yeah, but how would you like it if someone told the triplets that you gave birth to them? [The
triplets stare at him.
] I'm gonna go tell Emma she was an accident.

End

 

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