[Scene: Monica and Chandler's. The girls are admiring Monica's wedding dress.]
Phoebe: I know. Can you hand me a tissue?
[Rachel goes to the fridge, opens it, and blows on the whistle.]
Rachel: You're out of Diet Coke.
[The phone rings and Monica answers it.]
Monica: [on the phone] Hello? [listens] What? [listens] You what? Hey, you listen here, missy! Wh—[She is
hung up on.]
Monica: That was that girl Megan! She booked the Swing Kings on the day of our wedding and said that
I couldn't have them back unless I gave her the dress!
Phoebe: Does that mean Carcass is available?
Monica: What am I gonna do? That is the dress! That is the dress! Chandler wants the band. What do I do?
Phoebe: Well, just figure out a way to talk him out of it.
[There are three short whistle blasts from the bathroom.]
Rachel: You're out of toilet paper!
[Scene: Ross's Apartment. Ross is getting ready for his date with Kristen.]
Joey: [entering] Hey!
Ross: Hey! What's up?
Joey: I just wanted to come by and, you know, wish you good luck on your date.
Ross: Oh, thanks!
Joey: Yeah. What time are you meeting her?
Ross: We have 8:00 reservations at Grammercy Bistro.
bistro ['bi:strəu]: a small, informal restaurant or a bar where food is served (法国等地的欧式)小餐馆；小酒吧
Joey: Wow, that's in, like, 20 minutes. You'd better get dressed.
Ross: I am dressed.
Joey: Oh. Well, good! [to himself] For me. [He picks up a jar of lotion.] What is this? Did you give yourself
facial ['feiʃəl]: a beauty treatment in which a person's face is cleaned using creams, steam, etc. in order to improve
the quality of the skin 面部美容
Ross: I have an oily T-zone!
oily ['ɔɪli]: 天生多油的；油性的
T-zone: the T-shaped area of a person's face that includes the forehead, nose, and chin 人脸上包括了前额、鼻子
Joey: Okay, dude! [finds a receipt] Hey, you, uh, you sent Kristen flowers.
Ross: That's right.
Joey: You spent $100. That's the limit. You're screwed!
Ross: Uh, actually, I sent the flowers before the actual date. So technically, technically, I didn't break any
rules. Thanks for stopping by, though.
Joey: Oh-oh! So that's the way it's gonna be, huh? Yeah, I can break the rules too, you know.
Ross: Oh, yeah? What are you gonna do?
Joey: I don't know.
Ross: Why am I not surprised?
Joey: You know what, Ross? I'm not gonna let you get away with this!
Ross: I don't think you have much choice.
Joey: Well, we'll see!
Joey: Yeah, bye-bye! [exits and comes back in still holding the lotion] Hey! So just a light layer?
Ross: Yes. Just here and there.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's. Chandler is entering without touching anything with his hands. Phoebe,
Monica, and Rachel are there.]
Chandler: Joey got meat sauce on the banister again! [He goes into the bathroom to wash his hands.]
banister ['bænɪstɚ]: the posts and rail that you can hold for support when going up or down stairs (楼梯)扶手；栏杆
Phoebe: Yeah, swing music is so out.
Monica: Phoebe, he's gotta be in the room for that to work.
Chandler: What are you guys talking about?
Monica: Well, um, we're just talking about the, you know, the Swing Kings and just wondering whether,
you know, they're the right way to go.
Rachel: Yeah, I went to a wedding once where they had swing music and, uh, two months later, the couple
got divorced. And now I'm not saying that there's any connection here, you know, but they did tell me that's
why they got divorced.
Chandler: But I love swing music!
Phoebe: Yeah, but, the Swing Kings? You know, they suck so much that people actually die at their
concerts. They just stop living.
Chandler: Look, all I know was when Monica and I went to see them, we had fun! And there's another
Rachel: Well, what is the other reason?
Chandler: I don't wanna say.
Rachel: Well, you have to, because maybe it's stupid.
Chandler: Well, it's just while Monica and I were dancing to them, that was the first time I knew that you
were the woman that I wanted to dance all my dances with.
Monica: Oh, crap!
[Scene: Grammercy Bistro. Ross and Kristen are waiting for their table to be ready.]
Ross: So they said our table will be ready in just a few minutes.
Kristen: Oh, great!
Kristen: Is your back feeling better?
Ross: Oh, yeah, that's fine. I guess the more muscles you have, the more they can spasm out of control.
spasm: 抽筋 (<转化>spasm只有名词词性，此处转化为动词使用。)
Joey: [entering] Kristen?
Kristen: Hi! What are you doing here?
Joey: Oh, I like this place. Yeah. And, technically, technically, I'm not breaking any rules so, you know.
Kristen: Well, uh, Ross, this is Joey. Joey, Ross.
Ross: Hi. [They shake hands.] It's nice to meet you. Yeah. I used to have a friend named Joey. I don't
Kristen: Our table will be ready in a couple minutes.
Ross: Yeah. So…
Joey: Sure! I would love to wait with you guys! Thanks! [sits down]
Ross: So, Joey, um, you look familiar. Are, uh, are you on TV or something?
Kristen: Well, Joey doesn't like to talk about it, but he's one of the stars of "Days Of Our Lives".
Ross: That's right! That's right. Don't you play a woman?
Joey: A woman in a man's body.
Ross: Much better.
Joey: So, you know, Ross, it's funny 'cause you look familiar to me too. Have you ever been married?
Ross: Well, yes, yes, I have. In fact, um, just the other day Kristen and I were talking about how I've been married and how I have a son.
Kristen: Yeah, little Eric.
Ross: That's right! Wait, no, Ben.
Joey: So you've just married the one time, then?
Ross: Well, um…
Kristen: You've been married twice?
Ross: Yes. And another time after that. Boy, I'm getting hungry! Hey, Joey, have you ever been so hungry
on a date that when the girl goes to the bathroom, you eat some of her food?
Kristen: You said the waiter ate my crab cake.
crab cake: 蟹肉饼，参见322.文化详解2.
Joey: Yeah. So, uh, Ross, well, now, why did that first marriage break up, hmm? Was it because the
woman was straight or because she was a lesbian?
Kristen: Do you two know each other?
Joey and Ross: No. No.
Joey: It just seems like Ross is the kind of a guy who would marry a woman on the verge of being a
lesbian and then push her over the edge.
on the verge of something/of doing something: very near to the moment when someone does something or
something happens 接近于…，濒于…
Ross: Wait a minute! Were you on a poster for gonorrhea?
gonorrhea [ˌɡɑnəˈriə]: a disease of the sexual organs, caught by having sex with an infected person (病理学)淋病
Joey: You ever slept in the same bed with a monkey?
Ross: Hey, you leave Marcel out of this!
Joey: Fine! You ever gotten stuck in a pair of your own leather pants?
Ross: Hey-hey, have you ever locked yourself in a TV cabinet, VD boy?
Joey: Monkey lover!
[They both notice that Kristen has left.]
Joey: When do you think we lost her?
Ross: Probably around gonorrhea.
the Waiter: Geller, table of two?
Ross: [to Joey] You hungry?
Joey: Does a bear shit in the woods?
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's. Chandler is entering.]
Chandler: Hi, honey! I'm home!
Monica: [from the bedroom] Don't come in here!
Chandler: Why? Do you have another boyfriend in there or something?
Monica: No! We only mess around at his place!
Chandler: You know, it's funny. I started it, but now it's scaring me. So could you come out here, please?
Monica: No, I'm wearing a wedding dress.
Chandler: Oh, you got a wedding dress? That's great!
Monica: Yeah, but I'm not keeping it.
Chandler: Well then, why can't I see it?
Monica: Oh, I guess you can. Okay, but I-I have to return it, so you can't like it.
Chandler: Okay, I promise, I'll-I'll hate it. [She enters.] Wow! You-you look hideous.
Chandler: Yeah, that's like the most ugliest dress I've ever seen. Wh-why do you to return it?
Monica: Oh, because it doesn't really fit. Oh, by the way, I-I booked the Swing Kings.
Chandler: Oh, that's great! Great! Thanks! But that dress, I mean, it's, like, yuck! It's terrible! It makes
me wanna just rip it right off you!
Monica: Okay! But you can't rip it. Well, maybe a little.
Chandler: Oh, yeah.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's. Chandler, Joey, and Ross are watching a basketball game on the couch.]
Monica: [entering] Hey, guys! You wanna look at the song list for the wedding? [They ignore her.] Guys?
Chandler: [without turning around] I thought you were gonna be gone all day.
Monica: All right, what's going on?
[They all slowly turn around to reveal that they are giving themselves a facial.]
Monica: I'm sorry. I'm sorry. I-I should probably leave you girls alone. [She heads for the bedroom.]
Ross: Yeah, laugh all you want, but in 10 minutes, we're gonna have younger-looking skin!
Joey: Yeah! You know, she could use a little…Oh, nice shot! Yeah!