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[Scene: Ross's Apartment. Ross and Mona are sitting on the couch.]
Mona: I love your place! Where is this guy from?
Ross: Uh, that's an eighteenth century Indian artifact from Calcutta.
artifact ['ɑrtə,fækt]: an object that is made by a person, especially something of historical or cultural interest 人工制
品;(尤指具有人类学研究价值的)手工制品,手工艺品
Calcutta [kæl'kʌtə]: 加尔各答(印度东北部港市)
Mona: Oh, wow! So, you're more than just dinosaurs.
Ross: So much more.
[They start making out and she kicks the statue off.]
Mona: Oh! Oh, my God! Oh, my God! I'm so sorry!
Ross: Aw, forget it, it's from Pier 1. [There's an knock on the door.] Sorry.
Pier 1: 全称Pier 1 Imports Inc.,出售进口的家具家饰用品
Dr. Green: You think you could knock up my daughter and then not marry her? I'm gonna kill you!
Ross: You know, this is actually not a great time for me.
Dr. Green: So? Come on! Explain yourself, Geller! First you get my Rachel pregnant!
Mona: You got Rachel pregnant?
Ross: Who did?
Dr. Green: You did!
Ross: Yes. Yes, yes, I did. [to Mona] But-but it was, it was just a one night thing. It meant nothing.
Dr. Green: Oh, really? That's what my daughter means to you? Nothing?
Ross: No! No, sir, um, she means a lot to me. I mean, I care—I-I love Rachel.
Mona: What?
Ross: [to Mona] Oh, but not that way. I mean, I mean, I'm not in love with her. I love her like a, like a friend.
Dr. Green: Oh, really? That's how you treat a friend? You get her in trouble and then refuse to marry her?
Ross: [to Dr. Green] Hey! I offered to marry her!
Mona: Wh…?
Ross: [to Mona] But I didn't want to.
Dr. Green: Well, why not? So you could spend your time with this tramp?
Mona: Tramp?
Ross: I'm sorry. Dr. Green, Mona. Mona, Dr. Green.
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's. Chandler and Joey are discussing what to do about the now naked
hooker in the guestroom.]
Chandler: I can't believe there is a naked hooker in there!
Joey: Wait! Wait! Maybe she's a hooker and a stripper, but she got confused about what she's supposed
to do.
Chandler: Could be. I mean, technically she did strip. We just, we just missed it. Ma'am, are you also a
stripper?
the Hooker: Uh, no. But I could pretend to strip, but that's gonna cost extra. Okay, here's the extras,
handcuffs, spanking…[Chandler grunts for her not to continue and Joey pulls him back into the kitchen.]
Joey: Maybe Monica's playing a joke on you, you know. Getting her own husband a hooker, that's pretty
funny.
Chandler: That is funny. Maybe for my birthday, she'll murder someone.
Joey: I bet Ross was in on it too. I mean, he was "conveniently" busy.
in on: 参与…的,参加…的
conveniently [kən'vi:njəntli]: 适宜地;恰好地
the Hooker: Do you mind if I smoke in here?
Chandler: Oh, actually, I'd rather you…Yeah, go ahead. We're gonna have to burn that room down anyway.
[Scene: Ross's Apartment. Continued from earlier.]
Mona: How could you have kept all of this from me?
Ross: I was going to tell you, but…
Dr. Green: But what? You figured you'd get what you wanted and then you dump her like you dumped
Rachel!
Ross: Hey! I did not dump Rachel! [to Mona] Nor are we still together. [The phone rings and Ross goes to
answer it, only he's trapped behind the apothecary table by Dr. Green.] Can I just…? [Dr. Green glares at
him.] Why don't we just let the machine get that?
Joey: [on machine] Hey, Ross. It's Joey. There's a hooker over here and we thought maybe you'd know
something about it.
Ross: No! No! No! No! No! I-I-I-I—I need to lie down.
[Scene: Monica's Restaurant's Kitchen. She's cooking as two waiters pass.]
Monica: Hey, guys, can I talk to you for a minute? Listen, again, I want to urge you to push the duck special,
because if they don't eat the duck, you're going to and it's not very good.
urge somebody to do something: to advise or try hard to persuade someone to do something 敦促,力劝(某人做某事)
push: 推销(产品)
Stu: So, tonight's the night of the big bachelor party?
Monica: Yeah! Hey! Thanks for getting me that girl's number.
Stu: No problem. So who's the party for?
Monica: My husband.
Stu: You hired your husband a hooker?
Monica: She's a stripper.
Stu: No, she's a hooker.
Monica: Is that, is that what they call strippers sometimes?
Stu: When they're hookers.
Monica: Oh, my God, Stu! I-I can't believe you did this! Now are you absolutely sure she's a hooker?
Stu [stju:]: 斯图(男子名)
Stu: Either that or she's just the best, most expensive date I ever had.
[Monica runs out.]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's. Joey and Chandler are still deciding what to do about the hooker.]
Joey: Maybe she meant to get you a hooker.
Chandler: Why would she do that?
Joey: Maybe she wants you to learn something, huh? Now, is there anything you're really bad at, you know,
sexually?
Chandler: This is the worst bachelor party ever!
the Hooker: What's taking you boys so long?
Joey: In a minute!
Chandler: In a minute? What's gonna happen in a minute?
Joey: All right, all right, maybe-maybe you should just ask her to leave.
Chandler: Why me?
Joey: Hey! It's your bachelor party.
Chandler: Which is why you should do it.
Joey: I don't want to. You do it!
Chandler: You do it!
Joey: You do it!
Chandler: All right, rock-paper-scissors for who has to tell the whore to leave! [Joey smirks.] What?
Joey: I miss this.
Chandler: I don't think we've actually done this before!
Joey: No-no-no-no-no, I-I miss hanging out with you.
Chandler: Well, we-we still hang out.
Joey: Yeah, not like we used to. Remember? You and me used to be inseparable. You know, now, it's like,
things are different.
Chandler: Well, you know, things are different. I'm-I'm married now.
Joey: Yeah, sure. And, hey, don't get me wrong. I am so happy for you guys. I just I miss hanging out just-just
us, you know.
Chandler: Yeah, I miss that too. I tell you what, from now on, we'll make time to hang out with each other.
Joey: You got it. Come here. [They hug.]
the Hooker: Oh, God! Listen, I am this close to robbing you guys.
Monica: [entering quickly] She's a hooker! She's a hooker! She's a…[stops as she sees her] Hi! Uh, we
spoke on the phone. [goes and shakes the hooker's hand]
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's. Rachel and Phoebe are at the counter as Ross enters.]
Ross: So your Dad dropped by. He's a pleasant man!
Rachel: Oh, no.
Phoebe: I'd better go. [She goes and sits down the chair. They both look at her.] Just over here. I don't
wanna miss the fight.
Rachel: Ross, I'm so sorry. Okay. I-I promise I will straighten this out with him tomorrow in person, or via
e-mail.
via [ˈviə]: by means of a particular person, system, etc. 通过
Ross: I don't care about your Dad! I care about Mona! She was there and now she's totally freaked out!
Rachel: Oh, okay, I'll fix that to. What's her e-mail address?
Ross: Rachel!
Rachel: All right, I promise. I'll fix this. I swear. I'll-I'll-I'll-I'll talk to her.
Ross: Okay!
Rachel: Okay.
Ross: Thank you!
Phoebe: That's it? You call that a fight? Come on! "We were on a break!" "No we weren't!" What happened
to you two?
[Scene: Ross's Apartment. Ross is opening the door to Mona. Rachel is there as well.]
Ross: Thank you so much for coming back over.
Mona: Oh, good, you're here. Yeah, and I was worried that it was going to be uncomfortable.
Rachel: No, Mona, just hear me out. First of all, I'm so sorry about my father yelling at you, but I heard you
totally held your own. You're gonna have to tell me how you did that.
hold your own (against somebody/something) (in something): to remain in a strong position when someone is
attacking you, competing with you, etc. (面对攻击或反对等)顶住
Ross: Focus.
Rachel: Okay. Um, But—Okay, yes, Ross and I used to date. And, yes, we are gonna have a baby. But we
are definitely not getting back together.
Mona: How can I be sure of that?
Rachel: Oh, because we drove each other crazy!
Ross: Yeah.
Rachel: I mean, he was possessive, he was jealous, he could never just let the little things go!
possessive [pə'zesiv]: Someone who is possessive about another person wants all that person's love and attention.
(对某人)独占欲强的
Ross: Trying to date this woman.
Rachel: Right! But, none of that compared to how kind and-and gentle and thoughtful he is. [rubbing his
shoulder]
Ross: Probably shouldn't touch me.
Mona: You know, I-I-I just, I don't wanna get in the middle of something so complicated.
Rachel: I know, I get it. But, Mona, what relationship is not complicated? I mean, we all have our baggage!
You must too! Why else would you still be single? [Mona looks at her.] I am so gonna leave right now. [Ross
opens the door for her and she leaves.]
baggage ['bæɡidʒ]: You can use baggage to refer to someone's emotional problems, fixed ideas, or prejudices. (感
情或思想上的)包袱
Ross: Should I leave this open for you too?
Mona: I'm not sure yet. Why didn't you just tell me about all this?
Ross: Because what's going on with Rachel has nothing to do with how I feel about you.
Mona: Yeah? Well, you still should've told me.
Ross: I know and I was going to, but I thought it was better that you heard it from Rachel's father. Look,
I-I made a mistake, but it's only because I really, really like you. Really!
Mona: Okay, I guess you can close the door now. [He does so and they kiss.]
Rachel: [entering] Forgot my purse! [sees them kissing] Oh, you guys made up. [to Mona] He's a good
kisser, isn't he? [Ross goes to close the door on her.] I'm going! [quickly leaves and Ross locks the door]
[Scene: Monica and Chandler's. The bachelor party has ended and Monica is trying to explain herself to
Chandler.]
Monica: I swear I didn't know she was a hooker! I mean, wh—Did you let her smoke in here?
Chandler: Her ass print is still on your grandmother's quilt. Do you really wanna talk about smoking?
quilt [kwilt]: a bed cover made by sewing layers of cloth together, usually with different colours sewn together to
make a design 被子
Monica: You know what? I'm gonna make this up to you. I promised you a stripper , and you're gonna get
a stripper. [turns on the radio and starts to strip]
Chandler: Monica! Wait!
Monica: What?
Chandler: [puts on his crown] Carry on.
Monica: Oh, these tennis shoes are so tight. I think I'll take them off.
tennis shoe: a rubber-soled canvas shoe tied with laces 网球鞋
Chandler: Could you not narrate?
narrate [ˈnæreit]: to speak the words that form the text of a documentary film or program 给(电影或节目)作解说
Monica: Gotcha, sailor.
Closing Credits
[Scene: Joey and Rachel's. Rachel is being yelled at by her Dad over the phone.]
Dr. Green: [on the phone] …just because you're not in love with the guy…
Phoebe: [entering] Wow, you told your Dad the truth.
Rachel: About an hour ago.
Phoebe: Wanna go see a movie?
Rachel: Yes! [She sets the phone on the counter without hanging it up.] Bye, Dad.
Dr. Green: [on the phone] …there's gonna be a wedding! [Joey enters from his room and goes to get a
beer from the fridge.] What the hell does love have to do with it anyway? There are more important
things in a marriage than love! [Joey hears something and looks around for the source.] You have to
think about the baby! You have to think about the consequences of your decisions. [Joey finds that the
sound is coming from the phone and puts it to his ear.]
Joey: [on the phone] Hey! I do too think about the consequences of my decisions! [listens] What gives
you the right to…? [listens] Go to hell! [hangs up] Stupid guy on my phone.
I do too… (<比>803.Rachel: I can too eat by myself!)
End
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