志萍的三分田

以中文为锄 以英文为铲

02月 6th, 2017

【原创】819.The One with Joey’s Interview—Part1

老友记笔记, by 李志萍.

使用笔记前,请阅读《志萍版老友记英语笔记的使用说明

[Scene: Monica and Chandler's
. Everyone except Phoebe is there. Rachel enters carrying a magazine.]

Rachel: Hi!


Ross: Hey!


Monica: Hey!


Rachel: So, I
'm in my apartment doing the "Soap Opera Digest" crossword puzzle, and guess who is the
clue for three down. [She hands the magazine to Joey.]
Soap Opera Digest: 《肥皂剧文摘》,参见218.文化详解6.

Joey: 
[reading] Three down, "Days Of Our Lives" star blank Tribbiani. That's me! I'm blank!

Monica: How cool is this? We know three down! I
'm touching three down! [She has her hand on his
shoulder.
]

Joey: Yeah
, you are, baby.

Monica: 
Three down knows I
'm married. What's three down doing?

Joey: 
Sorry.

Rachel: So did they call you to tell you your name
's gonna be in this?

Joey: No.
They really like me over there. They wanted to do a big profile on me, but I said no.
profile ['prəufail]: a short article or programme in which their life and character are described 对一个人的能力、个性
的简要描述;传略


Ross: Why
 did you say no?

Joey: Remember what happened the last time I did an interview for them? I said I write a lot of my own
lines, and then the writers got mad and made my character fall down the elevator shaft. So who knows
what I might say this time
?

Chandler: If
 only there was something in your head to control the things you say. [Joey nods his agreement.]

Rachel: Oh, come on
, Joey! You will totally keep it in check this time. And plus, you know the publicity
would be really good for your career! And you deserve that! And if you do the interview, you could mention,
oh
, I don't know, gal pal Rachel Green?
keep in check: 牵制;约束;阻止
publicity [pʌb'lɪsəti]: the attention that is given to someone or something by newspapers, television, etc. 宣传;推广
gal pal: a female friend 女性朋友

Chandler: Is that gal pal spelled L-O-S-E-R?


Rachel: Okay, don
't listen to him. Please?

Joey: Fine!
 All right, I'll do it. But, hey! You guys have to be at the next table, so you can stop me if I, you
know, start to say something stupid.

Ross: Just then or-or all the time,
'cause we have jobs, you know.

Rachel:
 Come on!
We will be there for you the whole time! Just remember, gal pal Rachel Green.
[excited] Ha-ha! I'm gonna be in "Soap Opera Digest"! And not just in the dumb crossword puzzle.
[looks at Joey] Seriously, proud of you.

Joey:
 Yeah
.

Opening Credits

[Scene: Central Perk. Joey is there for his interview and everyone but Phoebe are hiding on the couch.]

the Interviewer: 
I really appreciate you taking the time to do this.

Joey: 
Oh, not at all. Happy to do it.

[Cut to the rest of the gang sitting low on the couch and craning their necks to watch the interview]
crane [krein]: If you crane your neck or head, you stretch your neck in a particular direction in order to see or
hear something better. 伸长(脖子
)

Monica: 
[to Chandler] You think we're being obvious?

Chandler: No, we
're just four people with neck problems who talk like this. [out of the sides of their mouths]

[Cut to the interview]

the Interviewer: I think it
's great that you wanted to meet here. You know, when most people hear that the
magazine is paying for it
, they want to go to a big fancy restaurant.

Joey: Actually, I didn
't know the magazine was paying. Wouldn't have mattered. I'm doing this for the fans,
not for the free food.


Gunther: Can I get you anything?

the Interviewer:
 Um, I
'll have a cup of coffee.

Joey: And I
'll have all the muffins.

[Cut to the gang]

Phoebe: 
[entering] Hey!

Ross: Shh! We
're not talking.

Phoebe: Oh
, finally! Oh. [sits back in relief]

[Cut to the interview]

the Interviewer: So, according to your
bio, you've done quite a bit of work before "Days of Our Lives".
Anything
that you're particularly proud of?
bio ['baiəu]: (尤指供公开发表的)个人简历,履历,(常为非常简略的)传记(biography的缩写)

[This starts a series of flashbacks. The first one is from "The One with The Butt". Joey is in a play called
Freud!]


Joey: [goes into a song-and-dance number] 
All you want is a dingle.
What you envy's a schwang.
A thing through which you can tinkle,
Or play with or simply let hang.

[The next one is from "The One with the Metaphorical Tunnel". Joey is on Amazing Discoveries.]


Host on TV: 
Folks, has this ever happened to you? You go to the refrigerator to get a nice glass of
milk and these darn cartons are so flinging
-flanging hard to open.

 

Joey: [on TV] Oh, you said it, Mike. [rips open the carton and spills milk on the counter] Aw! There's got to
be a better way!

Host on TV: 

And there is, Kevin. This is his first time. He's never used this product before. You're gonna
see how easy this is to do. Go ahead.
 This works in any milk carton.

 

 

Joey: 

[on TV] Wow, it is easy. [Joey jabs the spout into a carton and pours some milk out.] Now I
can have milk everyday.


[The next one is from "The One with the Screamer". It's the end of Joey's play.]

Lauren: So this is it? Victor?

Joey: Yeah, I guess it is. And so…I'm gonna get on this spaceship, [a ladder comes down] and I'm gonna
go to Blargon 7 in search of alternative fuels. But when I return, 200 years from now, you'll be long gone.
But I won't have aged at all.
[gets on the ladder] So you tell your great great granddaughter to look me up,
because
, Adrienne, baby, I'm gonna wanna meet her.

[The next one is from "The One with Phoebe's Husband", when everyone including Julie is watching Joey
in his porno.]


Joey: Shh-shh! Okay, here I come. Here I come. See, I'm coming to fix the copier. I can't get to the
copier
. I'm thinking 'What do I do? What do I do?' So I just watch them have sex. And then I say- Wait,
here's my line
. 'You know, that's bad for the paper tray.'

Chandler: Nice work, my friend.

Joey: Thank you. Wait-wait-wait-wait, you see me again. Hang on. The guy's butt's blocking me.
There I am
. There I am. There I am. 

[Cut to the interview]

Joey: Well, there are so many things. It's, you know, hard to pick just one.

[Cut to the gang]

Phoebe: I
'm gonna get some coffee. Does anyone want anything?

Rachel: Oh
, yeah. I'd actually love a blueberry muffin and a camomile tea.

Ross: 
Uh, double latte, extra foam.

Chandler: And a bagel with only


Phoebe: 
[interrupting him] I was just being polite!

[Cut to the interview]

the Interviewer: Okay, how about when you
're not working? What do you do in your spare time?

[This starts another series of flashbacks about Joey's hobbies. The first one is from "The One with
Phoebe
's Cookies ". Rachel is teaching Joey how to sail his boat, the Mr. Bowmont.]

Joey: [drinking a beer] Look at this clown! Just 'cause he's got a bigger boat, he thinks he can take up the
whole river.
[yelling] Get out of the way, jackass! [to Rachel] Who names their boat Coast Guard anyway?

Rachel: That is the Coast Guard.

Joey: What are they doing out here? The coast's all the way over there.

[The next one is from "The One with Ross's Denial". Joey is amazing Phoebe and Monica by holding his
breath.]


Chandler: Hey!


Phoebe: Hey! Check it out! This is unbelievable! Joey has been holding his breath for almost four minutes!


[Joey has puffed up his cheeks. Chandler pinches his nose shut. In a few seconds, Joey has to move
because he
's now forced to actually hold his breath.]

Joey: Dude! What are yo—you trying to kill me?


[The next one is from "The One Where Ross Moves In".]

[Scene: Chandler, Joey and Ross's. Chandler enters. Joey pops his head out of the fort like before, but this
time he's wearing a cowboy hat.]


Chandler: 
Well, I see you've had a very
productive day. Don't you think the cowboy hat is a little much?

Ross: 
[popping up behind Joey wearing an Indian headdress] Come on, it's fun!

Chandler: All right!
[He joins them in the fort and comes up putting on a bonnet.] Isn't this a woman's hat?

Joey: Dude, stop
talking crazy and make us some tea!

[The next one is from "The One with The Free Porn". Chandler and Joey are lamenting the fact that every
beautiful woman they see doesn
't want to have sex right then and there like in porn.]

Chandler: You know what? We have to turn off the porn.

Joey: I think you
're right.

[Chandler goes over and picks up the remote.]

Chandler: All right, ready?

Joey: One.

Chandler: Two.

Both: Three.

[Chandler turns off the porn and sets the remote down.]

Joey: That's kinda nice.

Chandler: Yeah, that's kinda a relief.

Joey: Yeah.

Chandler: You wanna see if we still have it?

Joey: Yeah.

[Chandler turns on the TV.]

Chandler: Free porn!

Joey: Yeah!

Chandler: We have free porn here!

[Cut to the interview]

Joey: In my spare time
, I, uh, read to the blind. And I'm also a mento for kids.
the blind: 盲人
mento: 曼妥思,参见101.文化详解1. (<例>mentor ['mɛn'tɔr]: an experienced person who advises and helps someone
with less experience over a period of time 导师;指导者)


the Interviewer: A mento?


Joey: 
You know, a mento, a role model. [Chandler bites his fist to keep from talking.]
role model: a person that you admire and try to copy (指人)典范,楷模,榜样

the Interviewer: A mento
?

Joey: Right.


the Interviewer: 
Like the candy?
like: 此处双关 (1) 像,如同; (2) 喜欢

Joey: 
As a matter of fact, I do.

[Chandler tries to jump over the couch but everyone stops him.]

the Interviewer: 
Well, um, another thing that our readers always want to know is how soap stars stay in
such great shape.
 Do you have some kind of fitness regime?
fitness ['fitnis]: the state of being physically healthy and strong 健康
regime [re'ʒim]: a set of rules about food, exercise, or beauty that some people follow in order to stay healthy or
attractive 养生法


Joey: 
Uh, we stars usually just try to eat right and get lots of exercise.

[Another set of flashbacks begin with "The One with The Ball". Joey and Ross are throwing a ball around.]

Joey: Wow! You realize that we've been throwing this ball without dropping it for like an hour?

Ross: Are you serious?

Joey: Yeah. I realized it a half hour ago, but I didn't wanna say anything 'cause I didn't wanna jinx it.

Ross: Oh. Wow! We are pretty good at this!

Joey: 
Yeah.

Ross: Hey! We totally forgot about lunch!

Joey: Oh, I-I-I think that's the first time I've ever missed a meal! [checks his pants] Yeah, I think my pants
are a little loose!


[The next one is from "The One Where Joey Loses His Insurance".]

[Scene: Chandler and Joey's. Chandler enters to find Joey lying on the floor.]

Chandler: What
's wrong with you?

Joey: Nothing! Well, I-I got this
blinding pain in my stomach when I was lifting weights before, then I, uh, 
passed out and
, uh, haven't been able to stand up since. But, um, I don't think it's anything serious.

Chandler: 
This sounds like a
hernia. You have to—you-you go to the doctor!

Joey: No way!
Okay, look, if I have to go to the doctor for anything, it's gonna be for this thing sticking
out of my stomach!
[rolls over and shows it to Chandler] Why did I have to start working out again?
[looks at the weights he was using] Damn you, 15s!

[The next one is from "The One Where Ross Got High". Rachel is describing her desert to Joey and Ross.]

Ross: What is it?

Rachel: It's a trifle. It's got all of these layers. First, there's a layer of ladyfingers, then a layer of jam, then
custard, which I made from scratch, [Joey and Ross make impressed faces.] then raspberries, more
ladyfingers, then beef sauteed with peas and onions, [Joey and Ross look like something
's wrong.]
then a little
bit more custard

[Time lapse. Ross and Joey are eating Rachel's disaster.]

Ross: It tastes like feet!

Joey: I like it.

Ross: Are you kidding?

Joey: What's not to like? Custard, good. Jam, good. Meat, good!

[The next one is from "The One with Joey's Fridge".]

[Scene: Joey and Rachel's apartment, Chandler is entering to find Joey bingeing on the food from the
fridge. Joey isn
't doing all that well.]

Chandler: Well, you…you don't look good, Joe.

Joey: The fridge broke, so I had to eat everything. Cold cuts, ice cream, limes. Hey, what was in that brown
jar?


Chandler: That
's still in there?

Joey: Not anymore.


[The next one is from "The One with All the Cheesecakes".]

[Scene: The Hallway. Chandler and Rachel are on their knees with forks trying to salvage what they can
of the cheesecake.]


Rachel: Oh! Yay! Look! There
's a piece that doesn't have floor on it!

Chandler: Stick to your side!


Rachel: Hey, come on
, now!

[Joey finishes climbing the stairs and sees them. Chandler and Rachel both stop and look up at him.
Joey sits down on the step
 and pulls out a fork.]

Joey: All right, what are we havin
g? [starts digging in]

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