Gloria: Jay, I’m home. Did Manny call?
Jay: No, because he’s fine. It was a slumber party, not a gang fight.
Gloria: I just want him to fit in. I'm gonna take a shower. Do you care to join me?
Jay: You know, honey, there's a gun in the footlocker in the garage. If I ever say "no" to that question, I want
you to use it on me.
footlocker [ˈfʊtˌlɑkər]: a large metal box used especially by soldiers to store things in and often kept at the end of
a bed (置于床脚边、存放个人用品的)小矮箱，床脚柜；(尤指)军用小提箱
Haley: Miss Mary Mack, Mack, Mack. All dressed in black, black, black.
Claire: Shh, shh, shh!
Phil: What's wrong?
Haley: With silver buttons, buttons, buttons. All down her back, back, back.
1. 玛丽·迈克小姐(Miss Mary Mack)是英语国家的儿童玩的一种拍手游戏。两个孩子面对面地坐着或站着，根据韵律节奏
Miss Mary Mack Mack Mack
All dressed in black, black, black
With silver buttons, buttons, buttons
All down her back, back, back.
She asked her mother, mother, mother
For 50 cents, cents, cents
To see the elephants, elephants, elephants
Jump over the fence, fence, fence.
They jumped so high, high, high
They reached the sky, sky, sky
And they didn't come back, back, back
Till the 4th of July, ly, ly!
Claire: Why aren't they trying to hurt each other?
Phil: I don't know, but I'm afraid to move.
Haley: You’re really good at this.
Phil: What is happening, Claire?
Mitchell: What do you think?
Cameron: Now, that is a scone.
Mitchell: No butter, nonfat.
Cameron: Shut up. I'm gonna go check on Lily.
Gloria: What's that?
Jay: Sounds like a bird hit the window.
Gloria: Oh, God, that's a bad sign.
Haley: Ow! That hurt, jerk!
Luke: Ow! I'm gonna kill you, stupid!
Claire: What happened?
Phil: Now I'm sad.
Dede: Hi, honey.
Mitchell: Hi. I-I didn't know you were in town. You didn't call.
Dede: Well, I couldn't wait to see your new baby. Where is she?
Cameron: Mitchell, who was that?
Mitchell: Uh, it's my Mom.
Cameron: Oh, yeah, right, 'cause the last time she was here, the refrigerator magnets rearranged
themselves into a penta– Grandma!
pentameric [,pentə'merik]: 由五部分组成的
Mitchell: Mom… Mom, what are you doing to her legs?
Dede: Tai chi. I did it every day in Sedona. Cameron, you should try it.
tai chi [ˌtʌɪ ˈtʃiː]: a type of Chinese physical exercise in which you make slow, controlled movements 太极拳(中国武术)
Cameron: Mitchell's mother has a problem… with me. Last Christmas, for example, she gave me a
piece of exercise equipment and a lettuce dryer. So, to recap, I gave her a gorgeous pair of diamond
earrings, and she gave me a hint.
Dede: And living in Sedona has been transformational. I get up every morning, and I go to a vortex
meditation site and work with a shaman to finally understand how to live my spirituality.
transformational ['trænsfə'meiʃənl]: connected with a complete change in somebody/something 改头换面的；改革的
vortex [ˈvɔrˌtɛks]: a mass of air, water, etc. that spins around very fast and pulls things into its center (液体、气体、
shaman [ˈʃɑmən]: a person in some religions and societies who is believed to be able to contact good and evil spirits
and cure people of illnesses 萨满(据说能通鬼神并能治病)
spirituality [ˌspɪrɪtʃuˈæləti]: the quality of being concerned with religion or the human spirit 灵性
yikes [jaiks] used to show that you are surprised or suddenly afraid (表示惊讶、恐惧)呀!
Dede: And I've learned that the only way I can move to the next level of my awakening is if we all can
somehow get past… the incident.
awakening [ə'wekənɪŋ]: an occasion when you realize something or become aware of something 唤醒；觉醒
Cameron: Oh, no.
Mitchell: The incident.
Cameron: Oh, boy.
Dede: I would like to congratulate Jay and the lovely Gloria. I'm very happy for them.
Gloria: I wanted a big, beautiful wedding with Jay because my ex-husband and I got married in a tiny, little
office of a judge in Colombia.
Mitchell: My mother wanted to go to the wedding to show everyone how okay she was with all of it, so I
convinced Dad and Gloria to invite her.
Cameron: Who warned you that that was the worst idea ever? Anyone? Anyone? Oh. [chuckles]
Dede: Of course, I've — I've moved on. [chuckles] I was supposed to come with a date, but he just hurt his
back, which is very ironic because he's young and — and healthy.
Claire: My Mom started drinking these cocktails called "Horny Colombians" with some of Gloria's uncles,
whom, apparently, the drink was named after.
Phil: Oh, come on, they were funny. [laughter]
Claire: They kept patting my butt.
Phil: [chuckling] Somebody's full of herself. It's a — it's a Colombian wedding tradition, they said.
full of yourself: very proud; thinking only of yourself 自高自大，目空一切
Dede: [glass clinking] I would like to make a toast.
Haley: Yeah, nana got totally wasted. Uh, it was really funny. Then it was gross.
Dede: To the bride and the groom — my ex. 35 years we were together, and he couldn't wait 10 minutes to
run off with Charo. That’s a joke. [rimshot] Seriously, I knew they were perfect for each other when I saw his
wallet and her boobs. [laughs] Take your hands off me.
rimshot: a drummer's performance technique in which the drum rim is struck by the shaft of the stick at the same time
that the drum skin is struck by the head of the stick, creating an accent 鼓边打击
3. 查罗·洛佩斯(Charo López)是一名西班牙裔美国女演员、喜剧演员和弗拉门戈吉他手。20世纪60年代末和70年代，在
Mitchell: Mom. Mom.
Dede: Oh, relax, Mitchell. What, did you take your Claire pill?
Phil: No, no, no, no, no.
Mitchell: Let's just go get a little fresh air, okay? Come on.
Cameron: And then it got weird.
Dede: [Hispanic accent] I'm Gloria. I'm Gloria. Kiss me. Oh, hey, kiss me. [guests gasping, murmuring]
Hispanic [hɪˈspænɪk]: of or connected with Spain or Spanish-speaking countries, especially those of Latin America
Mitchell: No! Oh, Geez.
Luke: Nana is really strong.
Dede: Ayayayayay! Ooh! Ayayayayay!
Gloria: During my vows to my first husband, drug dealers burst in and assassinated the judge. This was
Jay: What can I say? I drive women crazy. [laughs] It's too soon, I guess.
Haley: Everybody is going to be there, Mom.
Claire: I don't care. Your father and I are not about to let you drive two hours to go to a concert and then
spend the night with a bunch of boys, especially that 17-year-old hormone you're dating.
Haley: It's totally supervised.
supervise [ˈsupərˌvaɪz]: to be in charge of somebody/something and make sure that everything is done correctly,
safely, etc. 监管；指导
Claire: Oh, really? By whom?
Haley: By Spencer Patine's uncle.
Phil: Who's Spencer Patine?
Haley: You know Spencer — the guy with the arm.
Phil: Wait. What kind of arm? What does that even mean?
Haley: His uncle is Uncle Toby.
Claire: Oh, Uncle Toby. I'll be sure to include that in my Amber alert.
Amber alert: a notification to the general public, such as by commercial radio or electronic traffic-condition signs,
regarding an abduction of a child 安珀警报(当发生儿童绑架案时，通过商业广播或交通信号灯等向社会大众传播的
Haley: Oh, my God.
Phil: Okay, can I step in here? I think I can help. Haley, what your Mom is worried about is you getting your
heart broken when Dylan goes off to college next year.
step in: to help somebody in a disagreement or difficult situation 介入；干预；插手
Haley: He's not going to college.
Claire: That's not what I'm even think– He's not going to college?
Haley: He's in a band, okay? They're going on tour.
Claire: Oh, this just gets better and better.
Haley: Why are you always on me about everything?
Claire: Because you need to understand –
Phil: Okay, now, everybody, calm down. Let's start from the beginning. What's wrong with Spencer's arm?