Gloria: Jay says that I'm smothering Manny… But I'm just enjoying him. I mean, they're only gonna be boys
for a short time.
smother somebody [ˈsmʌðər]: to give somebody too much love or protection so that they feel restricted 溺爱；宠爱；
Phil: Best time ever in this house!
Manny: I'm uncomfortable with this, Phil. The manual specifically says "No towing."
tow: to pull a car or boat behind another vehicle, using a rope or chain 拖行
Phil: There are two types of people in this world… People who follow the manual, and people who stick it
to the manual. You… are hurt.
Cameron: Manny, what happened?
Manny: Football injury. My Mom will yell you all about it.
Gloria: Hola, Lily! Does my little princess want a cookie?
Cameron: Oh, well, you know, maybe just one. She's already had her sugar limit for today.
Gloria: How can you tell?
Gloria: Ay! Okay, Lily.
Mitchell: Hey, you two.
Cameron: Hey. So where… oh, where are the kids?
Claire: Oh, Haley's driving them over separately.
Cameron: Oh! Big girl now.
Claire: That's great.
Phil: So that was… so fun last night.
Mitchell: So fun.
Cameron: Yeah, we had a great night.
Mitchell and Phil: We should…
Phil: Jinx! [laughing] Yeah, we're going this way, so…
jinx [dʒiŋks]: used after the same response is said by two people simultaneously. Often, a game is played where the
person who failed to say "jinx" first becomes "jinxed", whereby they cannot speak until someone says their name.
Mitchell: We'll see you in a bit.
Claire: I cannot tell them. I cannot break their hearts.
Phil: So you're gonna have Cam's baby just to keep things from being weird?
Haley: Um, what?
Alex: You and Uncle Cam are having a baby?
Phil: Kids, shh. There was a discussion about the possibility of your Mom donating an egg, so that the guys
could have a baby.
Claire: But we decided it was not a good idea.
Luke: Why? Because Lily's such a mess?
Phil: For a lot of reasons. They have…
Luke: But we can agree that she's a disastrous human being?
disastrous [dɪˈzæstrəs]: very bad, harmful or unsuccessful 极糟的；很坏的；彻底失败的
Haley: I think it's a great idea.
Alex: Yeah. It's a really beautiful offer, Mom. I'm impressed.
Mitchell: Oh, my God. Cam, they told the kids already, and they seem to be totally into it. All right, is it just
me? Am I the only one that thinks this is weird?
Cameron: Maybe it's not weird. Maybe we're pioneers.
pioneer [ˌpaɪəˈnɪr]: a person who is the first to study and develop a particular area of knowledge, culture, etc. that
other people then continue to develop 先驱者；先锋；倡导者；创始人
Mitchell: Mm, no, we're hardly pioneers. You have three different hair dryers for different types of weather.
Cameron: Maybe it's just gonna take some time to get used to the idea.
Jay: What idea?
Mitchell: Oh. No.
Cameron: Um, well, Jay…
Cameron: Claire has…
Mitchell: No. I-I-I just don't think my Dad's really ready for this conversation. So…
Jay: Oh, stop acting like I'm some stodgy old coot. I've grown.
stodgy [ˈstɑdʒi]: 顽固守旧的，墨守成规的
old coot: a stupid person 笨蛋；老傻瓜
Cameron: Um, Jay, Claire has, um, offered to give us one of her eggs so we can have a baby that's half
Pritchett, half Tucker.
Jay: That's unnatural. I'm against it.
unnatural [ʌnˈnætʃərəl]: 违反常情的，不合人情的
Gloria: Oh, surprise, surprise. Jay is against something.
Jay: Cam and Claire wanna have a baby together.
Jay: You're not gonna do that.
Mitchell: It's not your decision, Dad.
Jay: You're not thinking straight.
think straight: to think in a clear or logical way 清楚地思考；思虑清晰
Mitchell: And you're not in charge. Okay, Claire and I are adults. If-if we want this to happen, it-it's gonna
Claire: So much for second thoughts.
so much for: used to suggest that something has not been successful or useful 原来…不过如此
Jay: Young lady, I need to have a talk with you.
Claire: I don't… Now?
Gloria: No. You don't get to tell everyone how to live their lives, that boys cannot spend time with their
Mommies or that brothers and sisters can't make babies.
Jay: So you're all for this?
Gloria: No. It's a freak show, but it's their freak show.
freak show: an event that people watch because it is very strange 怪诞秀，变态秀
Cameron: So this is happening again?
Mitchell: Well, I'm not gonna not do it 'cause my Dad thinks I shouldn't.
Cameron: You know, I'm not following.
Mitchell: We're not doing it 'cause I don't want to do it. What we're not doing is not doing it 'cause he
doesn't want us to do it.
Cameron: Just say baby or no baby.
Jay: Isn't it enough this family spends a lot of time together? Now we have to inbreed.
inbreed [ˌɪnˈbriːd]: 近亲繁殖；同系交配
Claire: Okay, Dad, it's not technically inbreeding. It's, um…
Alex: For the record, I think what my Mom is doing is very brave.
for the record: used to emphasize a point that you are making, so that the person you are speaking to takes notice 明
Haley: I like it. I've always kind of wanted a half-brother, half-cousin.
Jay: Really? "Always"?
Haley: Well, I mean, if you think about it…
[arguing] [all speaking together]
Claire: Oh, wow. When was the last time we talked under a table?
Mitchell: Dad and Gloria's wedding reception.
Claire: Oh, yeah. [chuckling] Um, mm… I love you. You know that… But I can't do this.
Mitchell: No, no, neither can I!
Claire: Are you serious? You can't… oh, God. I'm so relieved. I'm sorry. I-I-I… Oh. I am so sorry I led us
down this road.
Mitchell: No, no. No, Claire, don't be. Don't be. It was… it was generous and thoughtful, just like you. How
could I not want those qualities in my child?
Claire: Ohh. Oh, come here. Good brother.
Jay: So this is really happening?
Mitchell: Ah. What if it is, Dad?
Claire: Yeah. What if we love each other, and this is a beautiful thing?
Mitchell: Okay, it's our decision. It's not yours.
Cameron: So baby? No baby?
Mitchell: You okay?
Cameron: Oh, yeah. I'm fine.
Mitchell: Mm, I know it's been hard on you. Hey, what if we went out for a nice dinner tonight?
Cameron: Oh, that'd be fun. Should I call the sitter?
Mitchell: Yeah. Oh, you know what I was thinking today? What about Luke?
Cameron: Oh, he's so good with her, the way he looks at her…
Mitchell: My God, Cam.
Cameron: Oh, look, she's organizing her things.
Mitchell: Look at how she's dressed.
Cameron: Oh! We didn't make her, but she sure is us.
Mitchell: Hey, Lily, honey, it might make more sense with the shoes…
Mitchell: I like what she did with the dolls…
Cameron: Play as you will. Play as you will.
Manny: The big one, remember? One of the first ones we found. It was at the bottom of the gutter in the
gutter [ˈgʌtər]: a channel at the edge of a road where water collects and is carried away to drains (路边的)排水沟
Gloria: Ay, yes. We put the gum at the bottom of your walking stick.
Gloria: Ay, look at this one– the green one, the one we found at the floor of my taxi.
Jay: Your taxi?
Gloria: Yes. Before I had somebody running my life for me, I used to drive a taxi at night. Manny would
sleep in the seat next to me. One time, I had to hit the brakes so hard that he fell into the floor and he
found the penny.
Manny: [chuckling] Pretty lucky, huh? Eight years. I can't believe we're finally done.
Gloria: Me, either. Come. Let's go get your lottery ticket.
Jay: Gloria. I think you made a mistake here.
Gloria: What did I do now?
Jay: I counted these, and you've only got 96 pennies.
Manny: Are you sure?
Jay: Afraid so. I guess you're gonna have to keep lookin'.
Manny: Dang it! I counted those.
Jay: See for yourself.
Cameron: And now we upload your picture.
Mitchell: This is fun. This is fun.
Cameron: Yeah. And in just a few short moments, thanks to the magic of technology, we'll know what our
baby actually looks…
Mitchell: Oh! No!
Cameron: What happened? What is that?
Mitchell: Did you put one of us in upside-down?
Cameron: No! That's actually… Okay, I-I don't wanna see this anymore.
Cameron: Turn it off.
Mitchell: Oh, it's not turning off.
Cameron: Well, throw something over it! That… oh, God!
Mitchell: Yeah, well, we played God, and look what we brought forth.
bring forth: to give birth to somebody; to produce something 生(孩子)；产生
Lily: Daddies, what are you looking at? Aah! [screaming]
Cameron: Oh! [breathing deeply] Maybe it wasn't that bad.
Mitchell: No, no, it's possible that we overreacted.
Cameron: Yeah. Maybe our expectations were just a little bit too high. That little guy had some cute
feature [ˈfiːtʃər]: a part of somebody's face such as their nose, mouth and eyes 容貌
Mitchell: Of course he did. It's us. It can't be that bad. Yeah. Let's just take…
All: Ahhh! [screaming]