以中文为锄 以英文为铲

02月 13th, 2017

【原创】904.The One with the Sharks—Part1

老友记笔记, by 李志萍.


[Scene: Central Perk. Ross is there as Phoebe enters. ]

Phoebe: Oh, hey, Ross. Oh, I'm so glad someone's here. Could you zip me up?

Ross: Sure.

Phoebe: Thank you. Can you believe no one between my apartment and here offered to do that for me?

Ross: People. [shakes his head] So, why are you so dressed up?

Phoebe: Oh, um, Mike's picking me up for a date.

Ross: Oh, yeah? Now, um, how's that going? Is it getting serious?

Phoebe: Oh, I don't know, I don't know. I mean, you know, I like him, but, you know, am I ready to take my 
loins off the meat market? I'm not quite sure.
grade-A ['ɡreid'ei]: 优等的,最高级的;最好的
meat market: a meeting place for people seeking sexual partners 性市场

Ross: You know, I-I really admire your-your whole dating attitude. It's so healthy. I'm always, like, "Is this
moving to
o fast? Is this moving too slow? Where-where's this going?"

Phoebe: Yeah, you know, you are a bit of a drama queen.
drama queen: a person who tends to react to every situation in an overdramatic or exaggerated manner 作秀行家;

Ross: But, you, you're so much better off. You know, you just go from guy to guy having fun and not worrying
that it 
never turns into anything serious.

Phoebe: I wouldn't say "never". You know, there's that guy…Okay, well, what about...? Okay, well, there's
gotta be someone.

Ross: There isn't! That's what I'm saying.

Phoebe: Oh, my God, you're right!

Ross: I know. And yet, here you are, all ready for the next date. 

Phoebe: I can't believe I never realized this before. I'm in my 30s and I've never been in a long-term 
relationship! Oh
, my God! What's wrong with me? [starts crying]
long-term: that will last or have an effect over a long period of time 长期的;长远的

Ross: No, no-no, no, no, there's-there's nothing wrong with you. I mean, you don't strike me as the type of
person that wants to get married anyway.

strike somebody (as something): to give someone a particular impression 给某人以…的印象;让某人觉得是…

Phoebe: I wanna get married! [grabs a tissue]

Ross: Please, Please, don't cry because of me. Pheebs, I don't know what I'm talking about, okay?
I've been divorced three times!

Phoebe: At least you've been married! Oh, my God! I wanna trade lives with Ross?
trade lives with(<比>415.Chandler: Joey, trade lives with me!)

[Mike enters.]

Mike: Phoebe. What's wrong?

Phoebe: Nothing. I'm excited about our date. Mike, this is Ross Geller. Ross, this is Mike Hannigan.
ries again]

Ross: I'm sorry, I didn't catch that. 

Mike: It's Mike Hannigan.

Ross: Oh, Ross Geller.

Mike: Hey. [to Phoebe] Uh, so are you sure you're ready to go?

Phoebe: Mm-hmm. [to Ross] How do I look? [Her face is a mess from crying.]

Ross: Do you have a compact in your purse?

Phoebe: No.

Ross: You look great.

Opening Credits

[Scene: Central Perk. Monica enters.]

Monica: Hey, Joey.

Joey: Hey. This girl won't turn around and I can't tell whether she's hot or not. What do you think?

Monica: Joey, I am not going to objectify woman with you! [looks at the woman] But if her face is as nice as
her ass,
woo, mamma!
objectify [əb'dʒɛktɪfaɪ]: to treat someone or something as an object 物化 (<派>609.Joey: Dude, they're not objects.)

Joey: All right, thanks. Oh, hey, have you talked to Chandler?

Monica: Yeah, he has to stay in Tulsa this weekend.

Joey: How come?

Monica: I don't know. He has to work. There's some big rush on the…Uh, damn it, one of these days I'm
gonna have to start listening when he talks about his job.

Joey: Hey, why don't you fly out there and surprise him?

Oh, I'd love to. I really miss him. But I can't. I have one day off work and it's just too expensive.

Joey: Interesting. So Chandler's not worth the price of a plane ticket to you. Hmm.

Monica: Of course he is. Maybe I will go. Yeah, we'll have a little second honeymoon at the Tulsa Ramada.
Ramada [rə'mɑːdə]: 华美达(连锁酒店名)

Joey: Oh, and you know what you should bring? Your black see-through teddy with the attached garters.
see-through: (of cloth) very thin so that you can see through it (衣服)薄得透明的
teddy ['tɛdi]: a piece of women's underwear that combines a bra and panties (女性的)连衫衬裤,连体内衣

Monica: How do you know I have one of those?

Joey: Didn't until just now. [Monica goes to the back and Joey looks at the girl.] Hot, not hot? [She turns
.] Hot!

Hayley: Excuse me?

Joey: Uh, I, uh, I said I think you're hot and now I'm embarrassed.

Hayley: Oh, I thought you said, "hi".

Joey: That would've been better. I'll try that. Hi, I'm Joey.

Hayley: I'm Hayley.

Joey: Look, I don't normally ask out women that I meet in coffee houses…

Gunther: Ha!

Joey: [to Gunther] Gesundheit! But, uh…Well, this is hard. I'm kind of shy.
gesundheit [ɡə'zunthait]: (from German) used when someone has sneezed to wish them good health (德语)祝你健康

Gunther: Ha!

[to Gunther] Seriously, Gunther, you should see someone about that cold. If it gets much worse, 
you could
die! [to Hayley] Anyway, uh…
should see someone about(<比>901.Ross: Dad, seriously! You know, you really should see someone about

Hayley: I would love to go out with you.

Joey: Really? Great. Did I, did I actually ask you?

Hayley: Oh, um, that's just where you were going. I figured that I'd help you out. You don't seem like the
kind of guy
who does this a lot.

Joey: [laughs] Yeah. Damn it, Gunther, you gave it to me.

[Scene: Phoebe's Apartment. There is a knock on the door and Phoebe opens it to Ross.]

Phoebe: Oh, it's you.

With vegetarian corn dogs. Come on, Pheebs, I just wanna talk to you.
Phoebe: Oh, about what? How few ova I have left?
ova ['əuvə]: ovum的复数形式 (<例>ovum ['əuvəm]: one of the eggs of a woman or female animal 卵子)

Come on, I just wanna apologize for what happened yesterday. [mimicking with the corndogs] I'm
sorry, Phoebe. That's okay, Ross.
 So how'd the date go?

Phoebe: Well, it was awful! I barely got through dinner, okay? Every time I thought about what you said, I
started crying.
Yeah, I'm pretty sure he spent most of the night just staring at me in horror. But, you know,
I couldn't know for sure
'cause my eyes were swollen shut.
swollen (<同>309.Ross: And second of all, you know I had swollen glands!)

Ross: Pheebs, you-you know I wasn't trying to make you cry. I was really trying to say something nice.
mean, I was basically saying even though you've never been in a serious relationship…

Are we really gonna do this again?

Ross: Sorry. So he hasn't called?

Phoebe: Would you call this girl? [fake crying] "Thanks for a lovely evening."

Ross: Now I feel terrible. This is all my fault.

Phoebe: Well, you know what you should feel terrible about? This could've been my serious guy!
He was
, he was sweet and smart and funny. Do you know how hard it is to meet a guy like that?

Ross: We are a rare breed. [The Phone starts to ring.] Hey, hey, maybe that's him.  
rare breed: 凤毛麟角;稀有品种

Phoebe: [on the phone] Hello? Could you hold on one sec? I need some privacy.

Ross: Is it Mike?  

Phoebe: No, it's a heavy breather. I'll take what I can get. [on the phone] I'm listening.
heavy breather: a person who gets sexual pleasure from calling somebody on the telephone and not speaking to
them 喘气骚扰者(指给他人打匿名电话并发出类似性兴奋等时的喘气声的人)

[Scene: Hayley's Apartment. Joey and Hayley are coming back from their date.]

Hayley: What a great dinner.

Joey: Yeah! And, hey, thanks again for letting me have that last piece of cake at the restaurant.

Hayley: You're welcome again. I'm gonna go make some coffee. Can I get you anything?

Joey: Do you have any cake?

Joey: [in his head] So, this is going pretty good. Dinner was nice. We've got a lot in common. Oh, 
Victoria's Secret. Huh, we even like the same books. Oh, there's a scary painting. Wait a minute! I think
I've been scared by that painting before. You know what
? This whole place look familiar! I have
definitely been in this apartment! I know I've seen this weird plant before
. [There is a cactus and he
touch it
.] Ow! It did that the last time! Oh, my God, I've gone out with this girl before! Yeah, we had sex
on this couch and then on that chair and…no,
no, we didn't do it here, which is weird because it seems
like a perfectly good place.
[bends down and the cactus pricks him in the ass] Ow! That's why.
Victoria's Secret: 维多利亚的秘密,参见107.文化详解1.
cactus ['kæktəs]: a plant that grows in hot dry regions, especially one with thick stems covered in spines but without
leaves 仙人掌科植物(分布于美洲干旱地区的具刺、多肉植物)

[Scene: Mike's Apartment. Ross is paying a visit.]

Ross: Hey, Mike. Uh, sorry to just drop by like this. Can I come in?

Mike: Sure. [He looks confused.] Who are you?

Ross: I'm Ross. Phoebe's friend from-from the coffee house?

Mike: Right, yeah. 

Ross: Yeah, I really, really need to talk to you about something.

Mike: Okay, unless…You're not gonna try and get me to join a cult, are you?
cult [kʌlt]: a small group of people who have extreme religious beliefs and who are not part of any established
religion 小宗教组织;异教团体;秘密宗教派别

Ross: No.

Mike: Oh, no, it's just, you know, you have that look.

Ross: Damn Supercuts!
Supercuts: 超级理发店,是美国的一家美发沙龙,在美国有超过2000家分店,1975年成立,倡导理发合理收费的理念。

Mike: What-what's up? Is Phoebe okay?

Ross: Oh, no, yeah, yeah, no. Oh, Phoebe is great, but, um, I'm an idiot, okay? Look, look, right before
you guys went out, I
, um, I accidentally got her all upset.

Mike: Oh, that's why she was weird.

Ross: Yes, yeah. I, yeah, I said something stupid about her never having had a serious relationship,
but you should know she is so much fun, a
-a wonderful person! Please don't blow her off.

Mike: I'm not gonna blow her off. I actually just got off the phone with her. We're going out tomorrow
night. I mean, I hope that's
okay with you, stranger from the coffee house.

Ross: No, yes, that's-that's great. So the-the-the crying didn't turn you off?
turn somebody off: to make someone feel bored or not interested 使失去兴趣;使感到枯燥乏味

Look, Ross, I just got out of a nine-year relationship with a manic-depressive. Compared to that,
Phoebe's a Mouseketeer
manic-depressive [,mænikdi'presiv]: 躁狂抑郁病患者

Well then, I-I didn't need to bother you. You or the four other Mike Hannigans I bothered. One of
whom was quite large and
-and a little flirty. So…

Mike: Hey, wait-wait-wait-wait! Is that true what you said? Phoebe's never had a serious relationship?

Ross: Of course she has. If she'd never had a serious relationship, you think I'd go around broadcasting
it like some kind of unstoppable moron.
broadcast something ['brɔdkæst]: to tell a lot of people about something 散布,广为传播(消息、流言蜚语等)
unstoppable [ʌnˈstɑpəbl]: that cannot be stopped or prevented 无法止住的;不可阻挡的

Mike: But you did say it.

Ross: Yes, yes, I did. And I will also say what I'm about to say vis-à-vis the following. Phoebe has never
had a serious relationship since her
 super-serious relationship with Vikram.
vis-à-vis [ˌvizəˈvi]: (from French) in relation to 关于
super-serious (<词缀>super-构成形容词,表示"极、非常"。)

Mike: Vikram?

Ross: What? That's a real name!

[Scene: A Hotel Room. Chandler arrives from work.]

Chandler: [singing] Oklahoma, where the wind comes sweeping down the plain…Stop it! Why couldn't
they have sent me to Texas?
[checks his watch] 7 o'clock. Maybe I'll hit the gym. [sits down] Oh, who
am I kidding?
Pay-per-view porn! [Monica enters.] Do not disturb! Do not disturb!
Oklahoma, where the wind comes sweeping down the plain…: 音乐剧《俄克拉荷马!》(Oklahoma!)中的同名

pay-per-view ['peipəvju]: 付费点播的;有偿点播的

Monica: Surprise!

Chandler: Monica?

Monica: Is everything all right?

Chandler: Yeah, everything's great. I was just watching some regular television there. Well, what, what
a pleasant surprise.
 [He has changed the channel to a nature program about sharks.]

Monica: I'm gonna go freshen up, okay?
freshen up (<同>418.Rachel: Um, is there a place I can go freshen up?)

Chandler: Okay, honey. [to himself] Oh, that was close. [singing] Oh, the yellow rose of Texas…You're
not even there!

Oh, the yellow rose of Texas…:《德州黄玫瑰》(The Yellow Rose of Texas),美国的一首民歌

[Cut to Rachel. The phone rings.]

Rachel: [on the phone] Hello.

Monica: [on the phone] Hey, Rach, it's me.

Rachel: [on the phone] Hi.

Monica: [on the phone] Okay, I just got to Chandler's room and I caught him molesting himself.
molest [mə'lɛst]: A person who molests someone, especially a woman or a child, interferes with them in a sexual way
against their will. 对…性骚扰(尤指妇女或孩子)

Rachel: [on the phone] Oh, that couldn't have been pretty. But, you know, guys do that.

Monica: [on the phone] Yeah, well, the weird part is he was getting off to a shark attack show!
get off: 为…所激动;因…而兴奋

Rachel: [on the phone] No!

Monica: [on the phone] Yes! Chandler watches shark porn!


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